“One thing you could do would be to profile your entire romantic history; every event, the earlier the more crucial. Find out how you learned to be attracted, what attracted you earliest, and the entire history of this affair.

Do the work from a position that is not yourself; as if you are studying a criminal or serial killer, and must learn every little detail of what motivates, frightens, fascinates, repulses… and compels him. Take careful notes, make timelines, make charts. If you can do this work (and it should take months to complete), you will be both astonished.. and liberated by the results…”

— an intelligence agent